Travelling 26 hrs from Delhi to Hyderabad now I arrived here. Right now in the IDPO (R&D section) of Dr.Reddy's Lab. Its doesn't seem to fit in my profile. I doubt I would have been better working in an auto industry or any damn foreign university.
But let's be optimistic. Leaving it as for now will not be a good choice. Now Im sitting idle on a bloddy Win2000 PC where orkut/gmail and even IITK webmail is blocked! God why will anyone block webmail. The guide assigned to me

Time and Space

What would happen if time and space would be exchanged! This can be a concept of next Spielberg blockbuster.
It would be no big deal traveling time. We can easily travel back to our childhood. But then space would be unidirectional. We cannot experience the the same place as before. We can only go forward and forward. No looking back.
And then wise men would say. "Space is money".
Much more interesting can be added to this topic but only when i have space.err.. time.

!!

Exam 2mrw + on 17th !! Tkcr.
I wonder what does only this means.

Matlab poject: Done!
Abaqus Project: Done!
Exam Preparations: None!
Going Home tomorrow?: Done!

As exams are nearing, canteen bill mounting up. Spending about Rs.50 daily.

All day doing the project. This time I may experience whats it give endsem without preparation.

Might go home on Friday.

Exams up! Me down

Finally committed to Computational Heat Transfer for the thesis with our own PSG sir! So 5th year may be kinda cool with all the coding from the comforts of hostel room.

Besides this semester really gonna hit hard on me. With close to failing in 1 of the courses. (I still much chance of passing). OK. now no more of this stuff. Exams come and go. Life keeps on going.

Planning for a break in summers. With the internship already fixed in Reddy's lab, HYD, Im looking forward towards it as a learning experience. With the working environment of industry it will surely be a exciting. Besides I plan to read up some of the history and geography, at least the Indian portion of both of them.

Search for Thesis

On 2nd April I got a mail from department that you have to select thesis guide and topic for you for the M.Tech. by 6th April!!!!!
Good. I have to decide thesis guide. On such a short notice! People take years to know what they like and I ve been given 4 days!
Bewildered by this, I tried getting Computational Heat transfer, the only thing that was uninteresting to me in Mechanical Department. Huh! Kudos to me. I was rejected by the professor since he had already taken a student and the golden rule in this dept. says 1 prof can take 1 student!

I believe I can see the future
Cause I repeat the same routine
I think I used to have a purpose
Then again
That might have been a dream

I think I used to have a voice
Now I never make a sound
And I just do what i've been told
I really don't want
Them to come around

Home calling

It's 11:30 now. I've to attend a lecture 2-3 and then leave for home!
2-1/2 hours left. I've to take brush, bath, shave and make my bag ready for 1 week visit to home. Also to carry all the cubing gears.
It's good time ahead.

Exam plethora

Close to getting my first 'F' in college. It's 15 min before I gave exam. I can't speak now. I can't think. I am choked. It feels suffocating. Somebody give me respiration.
I'm still. I can't move. Feeling dizzy.
Now no expectations upheld. I'm ready to take in anything. And back to business! Get back to study. plethora

Unable to concentrate

With mid sems at the doorsteps I am not able to concentrate on studies. Partial reason is that I have not studied well this semester. Results are going to be unforeseen. But then how far is it going to effect my life. I don't wish for a 15 lpa placement from the campus. Neither do I aspire to sit in AC rooms and instruct people/machines for 15 hrs a day. So these things matter less for me.
Or they may?
I'm not sure.
But at last I am not able to concentrate.
Longing for the much awaited MID-SEM BREAK. One week at home. Nothing to haunt. It will all be fine. I'll be back to my good old form after that.
Task at hand is to bear the exams without much of damage.
Hope it's done!
Good night!

With dreams....
--Saucy

Poems

I came across this girl's blog randomly moths before. She writes amazing poetry. Read the following two which I found touching:

Just Because
Just because no one has been
fortunate Enough to realize what a gold mine you are,

Doesn't mean you shine any less.

Just because no one has been smart enough To figure out that you can't be topped,

Doesn't Stop you from being THE BEST.

Just because no one has come along to share Your life,

Doesn't mean that day isn't coming.

Just because no one has made this race Worth while,

doesn't give you permission To stop running.

Just because no one has realized how much Of a woman you are,

Doesn't mean they can Affect your femininity.

Just because no one has come to take the Loneliness away,

Doesn't mean you have to Settle for a lower quality.

Just because no one has shown up who Can love you on your level,

Doesn't meanYou have to sink to theirs.

Just because you deserve the very best There is,

doesn't mean that life is always fair.

Just because God is still preparing your King,

doesn't mean that you're not already A QUEEN.

Just because your situation doesn't seem To be progressing right now,

doesn't mean You need to change a thing.

Keep shining,

Keep running,

Keep hoping,

Keep praying,

Keep being exactly what you are already -




You Don't care but I'm here for you

You don't care,

but I am here……… for you

I can't give solutions to all of life's problems, doubts, or fears.

But I can listen to you,

and together we will search for answers.

I can't change your past with all it's heartache and pain,

nor the future with its untold stories.

But I can be there now when you need me to care.

I can't keep your feet from stumbling.

I can only offer my hand that you may grasp it and not fall.

Your joys, triumphs, successes, and happiness are not mine;

Yet I can share in your laughter.

Your decisions in life are not mine to make, nor to judge;

I can only support you, encourage you, and help you when you ask.

I can't prevent you from falling away from friendship,

from your values, from me.

I can only pray for you,

talk to you and

wait for you.

I can't keep your heart from breaking and hurting,

But I can cry with you

and help you pick up the pieces

and put them back in place.

I can't tell you who you are.

I can only love you and

be your friend.

Exams haunting

Ever since 2nd sem my performance has been down the slope seems this will be 1 more semester like previous ones. Exams from Monday. Hope to see Dr. Mahendu before exams

Today's Count

Today I slept for 10+1.5 = 11.5 hours.
Man! this is serious. I'm sick. I'm looking for the psychiatrist visit. I definitely need to consult. I need treatment. Its getting worse. I will screw this semester badly.
I also discovered that the throat infection problem which I am facing since 3rd semester hits hard only when exams close in. May be that's related to anxiety. My sister says that I have a high anxiety level.

Your choices are half your chances!

Choose carefully Choose confidently.

Sleepiness...

I feel like I am sick these days. Sick with what? Oh I'm sick of my sleeping habits. I'm sleeping like anything. Sleeping like 10-14 hours! Is there something called sleeping sickness?
I feel sleepy all the time and anywhere. In the lectures, at room. And once I felt sleepy in the toilets! Oh God! there is something serious about it. May be I am really sick. But what wight be the treatment for it. There are sleeping pills for those who have problems with sleeping. But where do they get these waking pills. [:D] I've tried coffee, biscuits (I don't drink tea). Once in a wile I was joking with my roomie that they say in Hindi movies that pyar me need ud jati hai. I wonder how. And I seriously need it. Coz I've skipped double the no. of lectures that I skipped in all previous 5 semester totaled.

Sometimes deception may be deceiving!

Sometimes even deception may be deceiving. You may be knowing the truth without even knowing that you are knowing it! But does that means that it is truth? Because truth is justified true belief and it satisfies all 3 condition. But the flaw is the justification is not that which corresponds to the belief.

Anyways I'm not in a mood to discuss epistemology(although I loved to read it when I read). The big show is over and now all set for the second challenges. At the beginning of the semester I accepted some challenges. I've successfully conducted Indian Open '08. I also finished near 60 (though not under 60sec). I got an internship in Dr.Reddy's Lab, Hyderabad; this actually happened 4 days before. The next thing up is academics in this semester. Im lying on the edge of 8.0 CPI. To keep above 8 B.Tech. graduating CPI I will need to work very hard and actually devote much time. Given enough attention this can be done in spite of the damage done in 1st mid sem exams.

But then at other times I think do I actually need to worry about CPI for the goal I have in my mind? If I screw my 2 semesters as bad as 7 I will still not go far below 8 which is not very much different from 8 . But the look of number EIGHT 8 might be of use.

Deception

Kai baar jo dikhta hai vo hota nahi aur jo hota hai vo dikhta nahi. Sometimes you try to judge people with what you see and hold them in high regards. But however convincing it may appear there is equal chance that its all DECEPTION. Equally true is the converse(not inverse) of the statement. You think that you have conducted yourself well but you might be very well misjudged by people. Deception is inherent in our life.
Existence of it (at least apparently) defies logic and rationality.

I'm dying to write about IORC experience

I'm dying to write about IORC experience but Monday is havoc day for our batch of Mech Engineers. Hard time preparing for two labs on Tuesday. It's painful to wait 1-2 days more.

Techkriti '08

Techkriti ''08 seems promising. With 39 sponsors for the festival as compared to last years 15 seems a big difference. Prizes over 10lac to be won!

But the little Saucy is too busy with it. Im not sure I'll be able to witness many great things this time. With the professors making it hard time with their assignments and lab reports and organizing IORC fort the first time little time is spare. I feel sorry to have not written so long. Very few posts over last few months. Even today I was half mind to write since I have to wake up after 5.5 hours for a lecture and then do 1 assignment, 2 lab reports and 4 lectures in the coming day. And the follwing day I am supposed to attend 2 lectures and 2 Labs till 5 p.m. And amidst all these I have to make sure that IORC is conducted smoothly, confirm participants for accommodation, buy some gadgets from city and ShopC, make calls to pidilite Mumbai office and arrange for silicon spray from Delhi, innovate ideas for publicity. Save me.

Mid sems

I will not say I am having worst mid sems but exams were disasterous. It seems I was not able to work upto level. Sttill 2 of them remain tomorrow. Hoping to do well in that. Good Luck for me!!

I'll be busier after the exam than before exams. I need to do lots of stuffs piled up. Using google notebook in Mozilla addon is really good. Its workig cool for me!