First Day

The first day of the four day green revolution of IITK popularly known as Antaragni started from the evening. That speaches were as boring as ever. And Mr. DOSA repeated the sentence that he says every year: girls don't like smelling cloths and mouth.
Then some boring performances. The other event of the night was the discotheque. There Asif introduced me to 2 of his girl coaching-mates - one Akansha and the other one was a difficult to remember name, most probably the name was Itisha! Sorry girl for forgetting your name[:(] ! Former in black beauty and the latter in pink beauty. Exausted in the disco. Leg aching. No not only legs, in a bihari's language salla pura body headache maar raha tha. That DJ was really sucking. Broke in the middle. We left but there was still some energy left in us. So it needs to be exausted too. The best way SAC! In front of Coca-Cola open-air threatre watching an ultimate chaatu movie CARS.
IN 15 min. exausted completely and then back to Hall-2. Discussed over the photography events with Bhargava. Decided (OR determined ?) to take part in the two events viz. humor-de-antaragni and the fashion photography. The first one was a cumulative collection of 10 pfotographs to depict the mood of antaragni. Went to my bed with some plans fext day and then I died. I was dead till 9:00 next morning.

0th day of Antaragni

Today the zeroth day of Antaragni today. Got some pics of Antaragni. Now I have to compose an exqusite balance between Antaragni and my studies so that i can handle the photography as well as my studies. Planning to cover the whole event through my cam and then make a photo diary for the event. In Focus! the competition. And then the fashion photgraphy and theme based photography event. All this exciting. But in balance with my studies. Got a tutorial on digi-cam photography and another one on studio lighting. Gota study them before the contest.

Decided!

This man seems more frustrating than ever these days. Now I have decided and am firm on my decision that I will change my room-mate next sem. He and his ****ing Godfather asshole S***. The man sleeps in my room, somkes in my room and I can't bear the smoke and had to sleep in some other room. I told him to tellhis Godfather not to do such thing but h again does it! All this is frustrating! I can't bear it anymore. Just one month in this sem and then I leave this man. The biggest problem with him is that he is a great asshole!

mID-SEM MARKS : 17/40 in maths. No probs because I was ready fo it. #1.5/40 in TA but hoping to increase upto 34.5 or more. 22.5/30 in inorganic chem. not quite upto expectation but alright.

Other: End sem exams starting from 24th. That means I have around 24 days from now. And 5 courses. By unitary method around 5 days to prepare for each course. Seems less. B.ut I will pull it. Thought of seriously involving myself in IAS preparations leaving aside IITK acads so I must get good grades for a decent overall CPI Remember: Never let go of hope. One day you will see that it all has finally come together. What you have always wished for has finally come to be. You will look back and laugh at what has passed and you will ask yourself... 'How did I get through all of that? Just never let go of hope and never let love depart your life.

Antaragni: Two days to go for Antaragni : cultural festival of IITK. Planning to practice on photography and take part in photography competitions.

Weekend

Exam just ended so weekends are very lightt. The maximum amount of free time without any tension of exam, quizzes that we can get here is not more 7 days.
Played cricket today. And tried hand at basketball last night.
I've started believing in what I said to Aman yesterday: Mai bahut kuchh seekhna chahta hu. I want to learn everything new. Meri jawani fir se laut aai hai. Shayad kuchh dino k liye mai boodha ho gaya tha.
I am serious for the end-sems also. Starting from 25th nov this time. Now I don't want to lose in any game of life. I want to excel everywhere. I want to doo everything which I like.

A post after a long time

So much happenings in the past 2-3 weeks. First of all the mid-sem exams- main culprit for the tittle of the post, then diwali at home, back to IITK, studies again, mid-sem marks.

1) Mid-Sem 2, sesond semester! The worst exam preparation I had after coming to IITK, or may be worst of I ever had. Done a blunder in maths and Electrical and thermo, TA and Chem were so and so.

2) Last exam at 6:00 p.m. and train to allahabad at 8:30. I ran like Bond but it Bond didn't helped me the train being late. Finally reached home at 3:00 at night. Then celebrating diwali and a short break at home.

3) Finally back at IITK at 8:00 a.m. on Monday Morning.This was first experience of early morning journey from allahabad to kanpur boarding alld. jn. at 3:30 a.m.

4) Mid sem. marks: 31.5/40 in TA, 16 or 17/40 in maths. more to come. Missed the IIITA online contest because the server were down all night yesterday. Caught hold of a really nice flash game. Attended
one more workshop on photography, potrait photography this time, by the same proff. Dr. Anupam Pal.

Introspective. Trying to search himself and his world. Doesn't like the conventional rules of living..so is very anti-social in that way. Does not feel good about himself.

In essence, he is on a trip of typical identity crisis.

iews on me by someone on orkut.
Am I this? Not exactly. I carry my strong identity. But I don,t run for the so called fame.

Exams up!

I've been back from home last sunday. IAS. done! Im going to prepare for it. The subject options before me: Philosophy, geography and ME. Most probably I'll be eliminating ME because as I've heard, Engineering subjects are difficult to crack in IAS exams.
Now exams coming up next week from wednesday. Very miserable codition in maths and batti. Lets see

I can feel the change!

Yes Im changing. Saurabh at the end of second semester was hell lot of different from Saurabh this day. The external and internal environmental changes have induced a metamorphosis in me. Some of the prominent factors/agents being my good friend Matty, my mother, me, a world called IITK and Mr. Robin Sharma.

IAS?

Worried about my future plans. Prior to comming to IITK MS- PhD was something I was set apon. But know the scene is somewhat different. What are the options for me? Job: I think I cannot do a software job or any departmental job. I don't want to just end up in workaholic. My philosophy is Kamaao utna hi jitna kharch kar sako. (Earn as much as you can spend). CAT? No, I wouldn't even like a corporate world where everyone ends up woking only for oneself, thinking only of oneself, living only for oneself. So, I will keep the job as last possibility. Even in MS-PhD I would end up as a proffesor in IIT's or some Foreign University.

Then IAS is the option left for me. It's something wherein I can get the opportunity to work for the masses. Now many people will argue that ye sab kuchh nahi hota, you can't help the situatio of this country. All officials fighting like this end up as a part of the corrupted itself. My answer is I agree. But there is a good chance that I can help the situation if I remain with my strong desire to work for the country. Many will say now ki sabhi aisa sochte hai par koi kuch nahi karta. My answer is ki jo karte hai vo bhi to aisa sochte hai. remember Navneet Sikera, the DM who troubled Shahabuddin in Siwan.
Besides this my mamma and dad will be more happy to se me as a civil servent than they would be me seeingworking for some foreign company!

In the upcoming mid-sem breaks I will decide whether to go for it or not and seriously start preparation for it after it.

Home beckons!

All set to go home in the mid-sem reccess. Eager to go home this time as it has been long time!
Some events in past days:

• Played cricket today and yesterday and had great time in cricket too. I think its all about a great confidence and concentration. Things are'nt really that difficult as they seem. Just have confidence. Ya, that's the tip. But Im not always able to do it.
• Just now had a 1 hour chat with Matty. He's also doing great. Decided to try out much new things. He even found a good girl in his college.
• Im also trying to learn a few things which I've never tried out. I think this gives a feeling of confidence.
• Worried about my future plans. Prior to comming to IITK MS- PhD was something I was set apon. But know the scene is somewhat different. Refer to next blog.
  

Sweet Moments!

Its a mail by one of my friends via orkut. here it is.
SWEET MOMENTS!!
Please make sure you forward this back to me...you'll see why at the
end!

Think about them one at a time BEFORE going on to the next one...IT DOES MAKE YOU FEEL GOOD, especially the thought at the end.
(Italicized lines are my comments)

1. Falling in love.
Never experienced as such. But as heard, Might feel good.

2. Laughing so hard your face hurts.
True

3. A hot shower.
Only in winters. You c India is a tropical country.

4. No lines at the supermarket
I just hate standing in a queue

5. A special glance.
Ya. true for everyone. But sometimes it may be embarassing

6. Getting mail
Not those ugly forwards(specially those from DOSA). In fact not at all. Only if its to inform cancellation of quiz

7. Taking a drive on a pretty road
Surely Sir!

8. Hearing your favorite song on the radio.
Yeah!

9. Lying in bed listening to the rain outside.
Its really apeals to heart

10. Hot towels fresh out of the dryer.
Oh come on. Not this one!

11. Chocolate milkshake. (or vanilla or strawberry!)
Yummmy!

12. A bubble bath.
Oh! I can feel it!

13. Giggling.
Thats something I respond very very strongly. Sometimes nastily

14. A good conversation.
Ultimate satisfaction. Soothens hearts.

15. The beach
Not been to a good one. :(

16. Finding a 20 dollar bill in your coat from last winter.
Ya

17. Laughing at yourself.
Hehehehehehe. Im doing it just now!

19. Midnight phone calls that last for hours
Hardly get those.

20. Running through sprinklers.
What are those?

21. Laughing for absolutely no reason at all.
Sometimes really sweet!

22 Having someone tell you that you're beautiful.
Satisfaction

23. Laughing at an inside joke.
A miserable situation when u r in a public place.

24. Friends.
Frequently

25. Accidentally overhearing someone say something nice about you.
Good!

26. Waking up and realizing you still have a few hours left to sleep.
Ahh! That's better tham the best. At least for a guy like Saucy

27. Your first kiss (either the very first or with a new partner).
Oops! Not aplicable in my case!

28. Making new friends or spending time with old ones.
Second one is. First one is also but encounter that rarely

29. Playing with a new puppy
Cutie pie!

30. Having someone play with your hair.
Reminds my mamma with hair oil in her hand.

31. Sweet dreams.
Ya but the thing is that we forget them as we are out to real world

32. Hot chocolate.
Hot?

33. Road trips with friends.
Heheh. The Bithoor trip!

34. Swinging on swings.
Childish but still sweet

35. Making eye contact with a cute stranger.
That one is very very rare.

36. Making chocolate chip cookies.
Never cooked anything other than Maggi Noodles.

37. Having your friends send you homemade cookies.
Ohho. what is this. We almost never shared such things

38. Holding hands with someone you care about.
With a soothing touch. Touches the Heart! I can feel that happen.

39. Running into an old friend and realizing
that some things (good or bad) never change.
Ya

40. Watching the __expression on someone's face
as they open a much desired present from you.
Hmm.... Yes.

41. Watching the sunrise.
Thats what I realized recently. May be after reading "Monks". Every natural beauty is a gift of nature. We never realize it because we see it every now and then

42. Getting out of bed every morning and
being grateful for another beautiful day.
Usually we forget that but tis verytrue

43. Knowing that somebody misses you.
A biiiiiiggggg YES

44. Getting a hug from someone you care about deeply.
Bigger than above

45. Knowing you've done the right thing,
no matter what other people think.
That's what I want to do always. But still to learn more in this regard.

What to do at IITK?

A questions that has been here in the air of IITK since decades. And this air caught Shanu 2 days before yesterday. And from him we all got infected.
The discussions started from what we are ought to do at iIITK with Shanu citing his experiences with a few proffs including his FacC Amitabh Mukherji and M.K. Verma. According to him they all said that it is important to do what you love to do, what you like to do. Thats the same what I used to say "Set your own rules". Then shanu again fiercefully dominating the discussion telling the story if his journey from Najiabad to DPS-Rkp to IITK. And all this time Gandu giving his vague arguments and down the line thoughts and ideas. Too frurtrating! ehh.
I was rather quiet all this time only insisting on my earliers statment. Then again Shanu giving most
.
.
.
.
.

Amit Chandra

While talking to him this Sunday morning, I just said that there are only few days left for us to go home for mid-sem breaks and that Im longing to go home. Also asked whether he is feeling the same. And I asked who lives with him in his house. He said something but that missed 'mother' so i completed his statement by saying aur mummy . But Oh no! why had I said this. To this he said no not mom.
What may I reason from this? What does this mean? Is that she doesn't lives with him or the other one. Oh God! let it be the first one. Now Im thinking how to ask him about this. Whether to ask to him or not? How to ask him? Now I see why he is the way he is. I think he lacks the delicacy of mother in his life.

Im sick of this man!

Yearlier I used to ignore but now I can't. This guy is made with the grains of superfliciousness, Pretentiousness and boasting. He always tries to show like he is superiour to others. And the asshole is proud to boast that he can dominate over anyone. Always tries to show the so called bakaiti. Im sick of him now. These days Im so much pulled up that Im ignoring talking to him.
What the hell does he thinks of himself?

Yes! I am of the second kind.....

Just no tittle for this blog.
This weekend passed in almost no activity. Late night bula session and waking up late. On Sunday morning got up late and we three, Kala, Chandra and me were in Kala's Room. And here was Chandra's comment:"Yaar maine ab tak dekha hai ki jo log all boys college ke hot hai wo do type k hote hai. ek jo ladki dekhte hi excited ho jate hai. Aur dusre vo jinki ladki dekhte hi fat leti hai ". And he said that I was the second kind. This put me in no further reasoning. Yeah Im of that kind! So what? Im not that by choice. Or may be by choice. Whatever. Its not because I fear girls. It's just because I have never known to deal with girls. It's coz I've never talked to a girl that I don't know how to talk to a girl. It's coz I've never been in their company that Im uncomfortable with girls. How can I help the matter.

You see Saucy has almost always been in an all-boys college.And then he was such a geek in his college, always walking with his nose up. And then his mom was so much concerned(its also true other way round) that he never moved out other than his school. Partied with friend for the first time after reaching in 11th class; and that too once or twice.

And when he was in coaching classes, he again went with his nose up, put his head in lectures and came back with his nose up. And now he is in an almost- male comunity of IITK. How can you expect him to be comfortable with girls? How can you blame him for that?

Sometimes I thought that migt be a problem for me in future. May be in proffessional life I may have problems due to this reason. Whatever you people may say. Whatever I may feel. I will still be myself for one and the most important reason. I said this to my mom and what he said is this: Beta, there is not much to b worried. you learn such things with age and when you need to. So again what's the tip for me. Be what you are; you don't need to try anything out; just keep doing as the situation comes.

Shanu, Lava on blogger

Hey. Mr. Shantanu Maheshwari and Mr. Lava Agarwal are the first two persons whom Im able to bring on bloggers. Now me, Lava and Shanu: fello bloggers. Exciting idea.
We've decided to share a common blog much like and the idea derived from the geeky-rubbish; to put our random rubbish thoughts. But the question is whether I must join te blog through this profile or the other one which has a more public touch. whether it will be right to be bold enough to share this profile. Shanu is aware of the life@blog, and probably I wouldn't mind Lava reding those blogs. But we 3 sharing a blog, may be other wingmates will visit the blog and my profile! And my first blog-post being visible.
Ok. Let me analyse the situation. No let it be. I'll join through this blog. I give damn if anybody in the wing comments about any of my postings. I will try to have a "give a damn" attitude.

Mid-Sem Marks

It again happened! Why am I not able to get out of this maths delima! got a bellow average marksin mathematics this time also. So now almost no hope left for an A grade. :( After improvement to B in 2nd sem from C of 1st sem, I was thinking of A in this sem. But now little left. Though I may fight to get a B. Others, except Thermo were so and so.

• Maths: 17/40 (19.3)
• Chemistry: 40/50 (36.6)
• Thermodynamics: 27/40 (25.6)
• Electrical: 17.5/20 (11.5)
• TA201: 28.5/40 (around 21)

N.B. The figures in brackets denote the average in respective courses.

So. Im in a good position in electrical and TA, the courses which I used to say are very boring, befor exams. The irony: Before exams I used to say that in this sem only 2 courses are worth studying, others are useless and boring. And now I've performed badly in those very courses viz. Maths and Thermo. Lets hope better for next exams.

Poignant Remarks!!!

Im very upset due to some very upseting remarks by people whom I least expected to make such remark. Ankit Kala! Yes, I didn't expected him to make such remark. first on my birthday, when I was paying the bill. I wa acting a miser in that. Then he threw the first one. "Saale 2000 ki pant pahente ho aur 500 ki treat bhi nahi de sakte. Waise to its not as such a big remark but it conveys some unsaid views that he carrys about me.

And often the same person as above tells me ki you are saddest person on the earth. Is being serious is being sad? Can't we be a bit more serious here. That's something I have complaint earlier in one of my blogs. People here are not serious most of the time, in fact not at all!
Sometimes such remarks HURT!

• Spent the last night in gossiping. It was not earlier than 5:00 a.m. when we went to bed. Disscussions ranging from girls to touring spots and the dressing sense of girls in our batch. Talking all the rubbish stuffs whole night on the hostel roof was lot of fun. It was stary night and we could see the Great Bears (none of us knew much of astronomy to identify any other constellation). A fallin star also appeared to join in our bulla session (bulla is IITK lingo for gossips).
• Maths quiz announced on 22nd. So gota study for it hard owing to a bellow average performance in the mid sems.

Flickr

Created a new account on flickr.com
It allows us upload our pics
here is the link

Photography session at Park 67

Now something about what Im loving these days. Photography.
On 9th of sept. there was a lecture on photography by some proffessorr Anupam Paul. I turned up on timee and saw him. Somebody told me that he is from BSBE dept. and he cherishes photography as passion. The Lecture was good. Learnt some new technical aspects of photography. Then there was a trip next day in the park 67. Took some nice shots there













The last pic is the fountain of park 67 in the dark. Gives an effect like Bagira of Jungle Book :P