I'm here

This post is just to declare that I've still not mutated into non-blogging species.

Recovering…

Written: 02 July, 2008

With 1 day medicine, I'm recovering. Temperature is normal and no headaches and stomachaches. Now 16 days to go here. All left for the final presentation on 18^th this month and then we leave on 19^th morning.

Falling ill

Written: 01 July, 2008.

Falling ill at home is so different from falling ill outside home. I understood this on Sunday and the following days. Got a fever on Saturday late night which was preceded by digestive system disorder. Probably it was a coffee attack. I was under coffee addiction from 2 weeks or more. The outcome was a manifestation of 4-5 coffee per day.

Whatever the reason was I lay in my bed at 3 a.m. in fever. Infected with harmonically varying fever, headache and weakness all of Sunday. Missed office on Monday.

At home when you are ill you are surrounded by mother and siblings for anything you need. Thousands of healthy diet stuffs ready for you.

Testing MS Word Blog

Title: Hallucination is reality

Written: July 25, '08

Steve Jobs is inspiring. "You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something - your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever."

But how do I know what to trust?

"Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking."

This is my first experience of blogging offline since I'm deprived of internet connection.

I'm really puzzled over what my love is? L

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

Hallucination is a reality

L
J
K ©Saucy

Hallucination is a reality but I don't see it anymore. Though everyone keeps saying this every time but hallucination is not a reality at all. But if you keep saying this to yourself like this 1000 times you might get into believing that hallucination is really a reality. K

We don't need no education, we don't need no thought control.

Hey teachers. Leave those kids alone.

All in all we're just another brick in the wall.

Life is an Affair

Life is an affair. You need to do justice with it. You can't just walk away cheating with this affair with your hands still clean. You ought to make it a successful affair as you would wish for your love affair.

When you are young opportunities are endless. Capabilities are infinite. It's only a matter of choice. Choose one and go for it. Only one thing that you like can make a successful affair.

 

Love it! Live it!

    

I am alive!

Isn't that a thing to apppriciate! I'm still alive in Hyderabad and not getting time to blog....
23 days left here...
Trying to wind up the the no-work work. [:)]

The Moment It Clicks

"What you see on these pages is not about a particular place, people, time or cause. It’s not about one type of picture or another. It’s not about sportsmen or fashion models or war or politics or the news of the day.It’s about being a photographer."

--Joe McNally

Travelling 26 hrs from Delhi to Hyderabad now I arrived here. Right now in the IDPO (R&D section) of Dr.Reddy's Lab. Its doesn't seem to fit in my profile. I doubt I would have been better working in an auto industry or any damn foreign university.
But let's be optimistic. Leaving it as for now will not be a good choice. Now Im sitting idle on a bloddy Win2000 PC where orkut/gmail and even IITK webmail is blocked! God why will anyone block webmail. The guide assigned to me

Time and Space

What would happen if time and space would be exchanged! This can be a concept of next Spielberg blockbuster.
It would be no big deal traveling time. We can easily travel back to our childhood. But then space would be unidirectional. We cannot experience the the same place as before. We can only go forward and forward. No looking back.
And then wise men would say. "Space is money".
Much more interesting can be added to this topic but only when i have space.err.. time.

!!

Exam 2mrw + on 17th !! Tkcr.
I wonder what does only this means.

Matlab poject: Done!
Abaqus Project: Done!
Exam Preparations: None!
Going Home tomorrow?: Done!

As exams are nearing, canteen bill mounting up. Spending about Rs.50 daily.

All day doing the project. This time I may experience whats it give endsem without preparation.

Might go home on Friday.

Exams up! Me down

Finally committed to Computational Heat Transfer for the thesis with our own PSG sir! So 5th year may be kinda cool with all the coding from the comforts of hostel room.

Besides this semester really gonna hit hard on me. With close to failing in 1 of the courses. (I still much chance of passing). OK. now no more of this stuff. Exams come and go. Life keeps on going.

Planning for a break in summers. With the internship already fixed in Reddy's lab, HYD, Im looking forward towards it as a learning experience. With the working environment of industry it will surely be a exciting. Besides I plan to read up some of the history and geography, at least the Indian portion of both of them.

Search for Thesis

On 2nd April I got a mail from department that you have to select thesis guide and topic for you for the M.Tech. by 6th April!!!!!
Good. I have to decide thesis guide. On such a short notice! People take years to know what they like and I ve been given 4 days!
Bewildered by this, I tried getting Computational Heat transfer, the only thing that was uninteresting to me in Mechanical Department. Huh! Kudos to me. I was rejected by the professor since he had already taken a student and the golden rule in this dept. says 1 prof can take 1 student!

I believe I can see the future
Cause I repeat the same routine
I think I used to have a purpose
Then again
That might have been a dream

I think I used to have a voice
Now I never make a sound
And I just do what i've been told
I really don't want
Them to come around

Home calling

It's 11:30 now. I've to attend a lecture 2-3 and then leave for home!
2-1/2 hours left. I've to take brush, bath, shave and make my bag ready for 1 week visit to home. Also to carry all the cubing gears.
It's good time ahead.

Exam plethora

Close to getting my first 'F' in college. It's 15 min before I gave exam. I can't speak now. I can't think. I am choked. It feels suffocating. Somebody give me respiration.
I'm still. I can't move. Feeling dizzy.
Now no expectations upheld. I'm ready to take in anything. And back to business! Get back to study. plethora

Unable to concentrate

With mid sems at the doorsteps I am not able to concentrate on studies. Partial reason is that I have not studied well this semester. Results are going to be unforeseen. But then how far is it going to effect my life. I don't wish for a 15 lpa placement from the campus. Neither do I aspire to sit in AC rooms and instruct people/machines for 15 hrs a day. So these things matter less for me.
Or they may?
I'm not sure.
But at last I am not able to concentrate.
Longing for the much awaited MID-SEM BREAK. One week at home. Nothing to haunt. It will all be fine. I'll be back to my good old form after that.
Task at hand is to bear the exams without much of damage.
Hope it's done!
Good night!

With dreams....
--Saucy

Poems

I came across this girl's blog randomly moths before. She writes amazing poetry. Read the following two which I found touching:

Just Because
Just because no one has been
fortunate Enough to realize what a gold mine you are,

Doesn't mean you shine any less.

Just because no one has been smart enough To figure out that you can't be topped,

Doesn't Stop you from being THE BEST.

Just because no one has come along to share Your life,

Doesn't mean that day isn't coming.

Just because no one has made this race Worth while,

doesn't give you permission To stop running.

Just because no one has realized how much Of a woman you are,

Doesn't mean they can Affect your femininity.

Just because no one has come to take the Loneliness away,

Doesn't mean you have to Settle for a lower quality.

Just because no one has shown up who Can love you on your level,

Doesn't meanYou have to sink to theirs.

Just because you deserve the very best There is,

doesn't mean that life is always fair.

Just because God is still preparing your King,

doesn't mean that you're not already A QUEEN.

Just because your situation doesn't seem To be progressing right now,

doesn't mean You need to change a thing.

Keep shining,

Keep running,

Keep hoping,

Keep praying,

Keep being exactly what you are already -




You Don't care but I'm here for you

You don't care,

but I am here……… for you

I can't give solutions to all of life's problems, doubts, or fears.

But I can listen to you,

and together we will search for answers.

I can't change your past with all it's heartache and pain,

nor the future with its untold stories.

But I can be there now when you need me to care.

I can't keep your feet from stumbling.

I can only offer my hand that you may grasp it and not fall.

Your joys, triumphs, successes, and happiness are not mine;

Yet I can share in your laughter.

Your decisions in life are not mine to make, nor to judge;

I can only support you, encourage you, and help you when you ask.

I can't prevent you from falling away from friendship,

from your values, from me.

I can only pray for you,

talk to you and

wait for you.

I can't keep your heart from breaking and hurting,

But I can cry with you

and help you pick up the pieces

and put them back in place.

I can't tell you who you are.

I can only love you and

be your friend.

Exams haunting

Ever since 2nd sem my performance has been down the slope seems this will be 1 more semester like previous ones. Exams from Monday. Hope to see Dr. Mahendu before exams

Today's Count

Today I slept for 10+1.5 = 11.5 hours.
Man! this is serious. I'm sick. I'm looking for the psychiatrist visit. I definitely need to consult. I need treatment. Its getting worse. I will screw this semester badly.
I also discovered that the throat infection problem which I am facing since 3rd semester hits hard only when exams close in. May be that's related to anxiety. My sister says that I have a high anxiety level.