My mom, my Life

Coming forward is the new year 2007. AS always this time too I wondered why we celebrate new year? What is our contribution in bringing this year. 31st December morning. Woke up at 9:00. Spent daytime at home. In the evening went out to meet Kushagra. And then at friend's cafe. Together with around 8 guys gossiping in the cafe. Conversations in which I was a little part were going on. Walked around the Civil lines for a while and then came back at home.
One thing special this new year though there is nothing new in this new year. I decided to present a diary to my mom as I wanted her to write about herself. Also put up a small write-up in its opening page like this:

Mom,

There is nothing new in this new year except my wishing you like this.
There may be things that I may not give you, but I always wanted to tell you that I want to give everything to you.
May be sometimes I haven't been what you have wanted me to be, but I just wanted to tell you that I always want to be all you want me to be.
Mom, you are one of the most inspirational figures of my life.
There is so much more that I want to say that cannot be expressed in words. But I am sure that we don't need words to converse.
Not even all this needs to be written but I chose this occasion, this New Year 07 to pen it down.

My Mom, My Life.

I want you to write something. Your thoughts penned down by you. Or some of important incidents of life, from past, or as they happen. Or anything. Just anything by you.

At home

Posting from home right now. A painful journey to reach home today! Left the hostel gate at 6:01 by my watch and reached my home at 3:07 p.m ! This fog in India is a reason of great pain to travelers as me. Road journey this time. Not by train! Was bored to death all the time in between.

Also bought two books on Indian philosophy for me. One by Dutta and Bhattacharya and other by M. Hiriyana. Currently reading the Outlines of Philosophy by Bertrand Russel, a great philosopher of 20th century, to get a general overview of philosophy.

A long chat session with one of my orkut friend. Also send her a mail with all my blog address. Even the private one. So she is the first to read what all Im writing in this blog. After all I don't mind anybody reading these unless the person uses it to invade my personal life.

Here is the chat session:
[08:54] psp: hi!
[08:54] myname178: buzz...
online???
[08:54] psp: online
[08:54] myname178: goood
[08:54] psp: what's up??
[08:54] myname178: hey ya
[08:55] myname178: a fresh new sem starts here today
[08:55] psp: wow..gr8 so howz it??/
[08:55] myname178: there were 2 lectures today...
[08:55] myname178: seems interesting
[08:55] psp: okay
[08:55] myname178: I ve opted for a Philosophy course this sem
[08:56] psp: ohh! gr8
[08:56] psp: so philosopher you are??
[08:56] myname178: hey hey1
[08:56] psp: what?
[08:56] myname178: this fst time im studying philo as curriculm
[08:57] psp: okay
[08:57] myname178: read quite some things on the subject,,
all those seem interesting
[08:57] myname178: the course is precisely Introdution to Indian Philosophy
[08:58] myname178: and how are u doing??
[08:58] psp: okay
[08:58] psp: that's good
[08:58] psp: well I am asuual now I want to start my new year in a new way
[08:58] psp: hope will be able to do that
[08:59] myname178: sounds good..
wat NEW plans in store??
[09:00] psp: just exploring myself a bit..overcome my weaknesses...trying something new..Want to indulge in some social activities as well.
[09:00] myname178: ??
[09:00] psp: let me see what happens??
[09:00] myname178: haan
[09:01] myname178: at least u are willing to try
[09:01] myname178: thats a big thing
[09:01] psp: yes..this time 100%
[09:01] myname178: u can do it if u are willing
[09:01] myname178: ya...
[09:01] psp: ya! even I think so..
[09:01] psp: so what's your plans??
[09:02] myname178: this sem i've planed to produse excellent acadmics result.
[09:02] psp: hun! good
[09:02] myname178: not for the sake of studies...
[09:03] myname178: But only bcoz i want to see how much fighting spirit is left in me
[09:03] psp: C'mon..your fighting just started..okay..
[09:04] myname178: afte JEE and joining, i've felt content with every thing.
but that spirit is imp.
[09:04] psp: you know we all are fighting on our own surfaces
[09:04] myname178: yaa! absolutely correct!!!!
[09:04] psp: ya! i CAn understand that
[09:04] myname178: exactly same I feel!
[09:04] psp: gr8
[09:05] psp: that is the ultimate truth of life.
[09:05] psp: is nt it??
[09:05] myname178: !!!!!!
[09:05] myname178: yaaaa
[09:05] myname178: so much true.. and so much like I think
[09:05] myname178: !!!
[09:05] psp: chalo we are somewhat like minded..
[09:06] myname178: hey hey!!
[09:06] myname178: I thnk very much...
[09:07] myname178: but from last yr i've started observing that things are not that difficicult,...
[09:07] myname178: we just need to try at them
[09:08] psp: ya! you can say but you know we all individuals are different with our capabilities
[09:08] psp: and life treats every1 differently
[09:08] myname178: true. but it is also true that life treats as u treat life...
[09:09] myname178: ur capabilities are the amount of capabilities that u have explored....
[09:09] psp: haan..that is also true..
[09:09] myname178: most of them need to be explored
[09:09] psp: yes! i agree
[09:09] psp: 100%
[09:09] psp: but we all are having limitations
[09:10] myname178: haa.. we need to constantly pushing that limit!!! that makes the things better!
[09:10] myname178: wud u like to hear 1 of ma personal experience on that..?
[09:11] psp: yes! Buddy sure
[09:12] myname178: Im a technologist as anybody can say on seeing me
[09:12] psp: yes
[09:12] myname178: I have never been good at drawing, painting, s....etc,.
[09:12] myname178: but
[09:13] myname178: one day i ws sittin in my drwing room and saw a canvas painting by my sis...
[09:13] psp: okay
[09:14] myname178: And effected by a book, wch changed my life significantly, I thot lets try out somethng new
[09:14] psp: good..which book can Iknow the name?
[09:14] myname178: Monk who sold his ferrari
[09:15] myname178: by Robin Sharma
[09:15] psp: okay
[09:15] psp: then what did you do?
[09:16] : Buzz!!
[09:16] myname178: then I ent to an aunty in ma locality for learning painting
[09:16] psp: okay
[09:16] myname178: fst time I took a painting brush
[09:16] myname178: and did a good stuff...
[09:17] myname178: take a look at http://images.orkut.com/AlbumZoom.aspx?uid=481397111712351421&pid=11
[09:17] psp: hun..so now you are a painter also.gr8
[09:17] myname178: Not like proffesional one but..
[09:17] myname178: i can do canvas painting..
[09:18] psp: but for your own
[09:18] psp: ya! that is good only
[09:18] myname178: I never knew that i can paint....
[09:18] psp: in a same way I want to learn guitar
[09:18] myname178: ,,,
[09:18] psp: that's gr8 yaar
[09:19] myname178: how are u doing at it??
[09:19] psp: but in my case I am too lazy to buy strings
[09:19] psp: you know one of my friends taught me and left this place
[09:20] myname178: means u were learning frm ur frend?
[09:20] psp: hey! this painting is really nice yaar
[09:21] psp: I mean you really inspired me at this point..
[09:22] myname178: thanks..
[09:22] psp: you deserve that
[09:23] myname178: though I painted it under guidence of that teacher. some part r made by her. but still i thnk i put up a decent performace
[09:23] psp: yes!100%
[09:23] myname178: and my second canvas is on completion... I completed it this vaccations at ma home.
[09:24] psp: okay
[09:24] psp: send on my gmail
[09:24] myname178: ya. i've sent u a request on gmail...
[09:25] myname178: i dont have its image now coz my camera is gone fr repairing frm past 1 mnth
[09:25] psp: okay
[09:25] myname178: im really suffering without ma digi-cam :(
[09:26] psp: ohh! i can understand
[09:26] myname178: i can send u te original pic which im painting
[09:26] psp: ya! Sure
[09:28] : Buzz!!
[09:28] myname178: ya
[09:28] myname178: chk mail
[09:29] myname178: i've sent it
[09:29] psp: ya Will check now
[09:29] myname178: Add me on gmail to
[09:29] myname178: too
[09:29] psp: ya! that I will do
[09:29] myname178: k

11:00 PM psp: quite colorfulll

me: yaa

11:01 PM psp: hey! you do blogging

me: actually its a painting by a gr8 painter Jim Warren

psp: right??

me: haan... very nuch

*much

so u also blog??

11:02 PM psp: no i dnt know how to blog

me: but u mst be knowing how to read blog...

11:03 PM psp: not exactly

so you teach me

me: okee

open this likn

http://geeky-rubbish.blogspot.com/

11:04 PM psp: blogspot is a specific site for blogging

me: all the blogs are posted in reverse conological order

its blogger.com

11:05 PM now they've connected to ur gmail act.

psp: okay

how to gmail

me: means. if u have google act. u automatically have blogger act..

because both sites belong to same company GOOGLE

11:06 PM psp: okay

that link is not opennin

me: http://geeky-rubbish.blogspot.com/

this one??

11:07 PM psp: ya!

me: okey.. try another..

smilingteargirls.blogspot.com

11:08 PM psp: hun

let it open

me: leave that

open this http://shalinsays.blogspot.com/

11:09 PM psp: no one is openning

me: try by placing www in front of it...

psp: i think problem is in net

me: put www in front of it...

11:10 PM http://www.shalinsays.blogspot.com/

11:11 PM still probs??

psp: dnt know

11:12 PM you mail me all these sites in one mail.okay

me: Im quite regular on one of my blog...

wch is like my personal diary.

psp: tell me that also

11:13 PM okay

i will also start blogging

me: take is link: http://www.saucy-unplugged.com

sorry that's wrong

11:14 PM psp: you mail me all links all together

me: http://www.saucy-unplugged.blogspot.com/

all my blogs are public except this one.. till now..

11:15 PM psp: okay

me: so plz.

>>

.

.

wait for min..

11:17 PM psp: what happened

11:20 PM me: hi again..

11:21 PM i was using my friend's lapP.

psp: okay

me: he needed it. now im at some other place

i'll mail u he blog links...

11:22 PM psp: sure

me: elsewise how is ur proffessional life gng..

psp: okay type

nothing extra is happenning

chalo saurabh

see you some other time

11:23 PM have to go office in morning

me: okey type??

okey then

psp: bye and take care

me: may be see ya on saturday..

psp: hope to hear soon from you

11:24 PM ya!!! bye

me: haan

Comments on this reserved for some other time. Gota sleep now. Its to late at home.

Speed Cubing!!!

Speed Cubing! My new favorate. It first happened during preparation of TA exams of end-sem. All the frustration was beared be he cube. Bhatia was had learnt one of the algo from net and Im using the same algo right now. Click here to see this guy named Chris Hardwick solving cube blindfolded in18.5 sec! This guy is passionate fo two most xciting sports viz. speed cubing and sport-stacking!
Now more and more practicing to reduce time. Presently my best timing is 3 min 15 sec. Looking forward to a target of 2.5 min first.
Look at this man solving cube with his feet!!!

Naya semester

Suddenly realised that vaccations are over now and
Im back in IITK. njoyed a day with Matty. Watched a movie- Girl Next Door wih him. Walked around the academic area. Then left him to his bro's place.
Registered for the new semester today. All 5 courses in this sem look quite interesting.
1) Mechanics of Solids: I had an unusual liking fo mechanics ever since I first studied it. Hoping that this course is similar to that mechanics it will be interesting.
2) Material Science: Have no idea. But Bhatia told that itz a nice course for studying. Everythingis logical and related. And usually me and Bhatia have similar perceptions on hell lot of points. So this is gona be smooth.
3) Engineering Graphics: From the experiences of TA101 I can say that this might be a good course.
4) Fluid Mechanics: This is also one of the topic I enjoyed during the good old days of my life when I was preparing for JEE/12th class.
5) HSS: This part is still doubtful. Psychology of Philosophy. If it is philosophy then its amazing! I can safely say that it is like passion. I simply loveeeeee explofing those concepts about Karma, atma and parmatma and few other elements of Indian Philosophy. If it is Psychology then also it's quite cool keeping in mind that Im already familier with half of psycho dictionay. Courtesy: my elder sister*

So overall a smooth going semester in store.

*My elder sis is Masters in Psycho and looking for Doctrate. In five ys. of his study she was used to parroting all those things and kept saying words like amazing, interesting, fascinating etc. She is mad about this subject.

Me and my Camera

Mai aur mera camera! Once we were together. Now it's decaying in the service centre from on month. Courtesy: Mr. Cool Gandu Gupta. Whenever I them call up they will tell a city in India and say: abhi aapka camera vaha gaya hai banne ke liye 1 hafte baad aega." Those guys and their stuff frustrates me and mom and dad. One day dad was so much heated up that he wrote an application to CEO of Samsung warning him to in Consumer forum court. It seems that he will never return it. Its the main cause of my worries these days.

But now onwards I will think that I had never bought a camera. And if I get it back it will be a bonus for me.
But from all this I got a lesson. Now I will not show nodesty at the cost of my parents money. Had I not shown more than required modesty that day and had not lend the camera to my friends, I would have saved my parents' money.

--Besides this one more important thing today. Mathur called me and said that he also needs to to Kanpur on 25th to see his bro there and offered to accompany me. After few discussions we reached a common minimum program that we will leave from Howrah-jodhpur exp. at 12:25 on 25/12/06 and Mathur will stay with in the campus for one day and catch a train morning for allahabad. So the day with Mathur at the campus seems to be exciting enough. Together we can stroll around and talk and I will show the campus to him.
But during all this memorable times I will miss my camera :(

-- Found a very useful link for digital photography. Today read about the Raw Image from it. It has lots of interesting tutorials.

Mom, you are great!

Mom you arw great. If ever I imagined my God it is no greater than you. These sentences may appear like a movie dialogues but ow can I help if I feel the same

....

- finished 2 chapters of JL Nehru.
- Got up very late.
- The cricket match. India defeats SA by over a 100 runs.
- Acting lazy bum in front of idiot box for some more time.
-The digicam seems to be never repairable. Whenever we call the guy he replies "Next Week". It would have been great time at home with the camera. But nevertheless, Im enjoying my laziness.

- Checked the mails. Bhatia mailed me that he immediately wants to chat with me at 11:25. But then he never told what has happened to him. He only said that he was very much upset and he not even wants to remember the event for the sake of telling me. For the first time I have seen him so much upset that can't even be talked about! Still it is unbelievable for me. I hope that it's just another prank played on me by him. May be somebody said to him something. But I can guess the problem is great emotional turmoil due to some reasons.

- Downloaded some lectures on Ethical Theory from: http://ethics.sandiego.edu/video/Hinman/Theory/index.html
and came to know that the concept of "making the world a better place to live" which I used to follow is formally known as Utilitarian concept of ethics. Accordingly morality can depend on one or more of the following principles:
“Do what the Bible tells you”--Divine Command Theories
“Follow your conscience”--The Ethics of Conscience
“Watch out for #1”--Ethical Egoism
“Do the right thing”--The Ethics of Duty
“Don't dis' me”--The Ethics of Respect
“...all Men are created ...with certain unalienable Rights”--The Ethics of Rights
“Make the world a better place”--Utilitarianism
“Daddy, that’s not fair”--The Ethics of Justice
“Be a good person”--Virtue Ethics

Out of this the last three appear more prominent for me.

- Nothing more happening.

Idiot box

Only watching idiot box for time pass. Enjoying delicious dishes inspite of miserable condition of my stomach: courtesy- my sister. Recently started reading An Autobiography- Jawahaarlal Nehru. But going through it very slowly keeping pace with my laziness.
Visited Mathur today. He was confused for career after B.Tech. He too was thinking to go for IAS. Bought a new cube today. Still taking lot of time. Stuck at 7.5 min. Problems with rough rotations of the cube.

Bhatia's Testimonial for me

The best way to describe saurabh is to say that he has got all qualities of a gud sportsman.. Dedication.. Honesty.. Team-spirit.. But the problem is that he is not good at any sport!! :-p

A very nice placed head on his shoulders. Has a very clear vision about life. Down-to-earth, considerate, extremely lazy at times. Shares my passion for heli attack 3. Never wakes up to his alarm. Even worse than me when it comes to girls (hehehe i beat u in one dept!!) Just that he smiles very little (bet half the photos in his album will have him frowning). Pata nahi kya philosophical batein sochta rehta hai (See his blogs someday, ull know wt i m talking about). Isko plato ya socrates ke institute jana chahiye tha, yahan pata nahi kyun aa gaya..

Narcissm

A pattern of traits and behaviours which signify infatuation and obsession with one's self to the exclusion of all others and the egotistic and ruthless pursuit of one's gratification, dominance and ambition.

Narcissism is named after the ancient Greek myth of Narcissus who was a handsome Greek youth who rejected the desperate advances of the nymph Echo. In punishment of his cruelty, he was doomed to fall in love with his own reflection in a pool of water. Unable to consummate his love, he pined away and changed into the flower that bears his name to this very day.

This is the definition for a mental help site.

Latter last month I read a review of biography of Shahrukh Khan by one of his friends in which SRK had said that reading oneselves biography would be finest example of Narcissm! Since then it had been troubling me. What if I read the blogs written by me? If I wan to recall the past incidents and the related thoughts which arose that time? Is this narcissm?

Lots of such questions troubling me. . . .

Days passing by

Today it's 11th now. days passing fast. I can count apon them. Then the nail is 25th. done nothing productive today except sleeping.
Yesterday mamaji came and told about a person who had studied under him and now working in IIPR, kalyanpur. He has experience of teaching for IAS exams. He says he his furnished with great G.S. and had taught philosophy for IAS. Kaushalendra Tiwari. That's his name. Im supposed to meet him for my plans regarding IAS exam preparations and if possible go to him for regular paid tution in philosophy and G.S. But it seems that he will stay here for only a year or two. And I having decided to start fierce preparation in latter years of my degrees. Now I need to review those plans after meeting him. I may also review my target of 10.0 in the next semester. Let us see what good is Mr. Tiwari to me. Hoping to be of great good.

Ishan and other guys having there exams from 12th to 24th. So less freaking out with friends this time. had a small chat with Ishan today.:
[07:29] myname178: hiii
[07:29] Ishan: hiiii
[07:29] Ishan: how're you, man?
[07:29] Ishan: i am caught up in exams till 24th :(
[07:30] myname178: mast hu
[07:30] Ishan: 13-24 sems
[07:30] Ishan: yaar, that day u came i was slleping :((
[07:30] myname178: ooohhh :(
me done up with those monstrs
[07:30] myname178: so got the book?
[07:30] Ishan: haan :) thanks
[07:31] Ishan: sorry yaar i cudn't tell u the name of the book on time... next time maybe ;-)
[07:31] myname178: thanks to u
[07:31] Ishan: aur how did the sem go?
[07:31] myname178: haa
[07:31] myname178: better than the fst 2
[07:32] Ishan: great, this is gr8 news!
[07:32] myname178: and how was urs?
[07:32] Ishan: internals were all good, about 460 to 470 out of 500 expected
[07:33] Ishan: externals begin from 13th :-?
[07:33] myname178: fod diyaa. good man...
[07:33] Ishan: hehheeh, ladkiyon ke about 480s mein!!!! :(
[07:34] myname178: hope similar boody instincts in end sems
[07:34] Ishan: ab ladkiyon ko haraana hai buddy...now is the time
[07:34] myname178: **** them all
[07:34] myname178: live urself!
[07:34] Ishan: UPTU means girls against boys... for me, that's what uptu is all about
[07:34] Ishan: haan yaar, u are absolutely rite
[07:35] myname178: u r only 10 marks behind them after living the whole sem
[07:35] Ishan: i am planning to phodo the exams... dekhte hain kya hota hai
[07:35] Ishan: haan, rite!!! poore saal bhar ghoome phire masti, and still 10-15 marks down only!
[07:35] Ishan: hehehhe that is good
[07:35] myname178: nd they r only10 marks ahead pf u after putting their heads in books whole sem..destroying their lives
[07:35] Ishan: and those creatures studied poore saal everyday and still... hehehhe
[07:35] myname178: its fair deal fr u!

[07:36] Ishan: haan, yaar... wonderful observation!
[07:36] Ishan: maine socha hi nahi! yaar tumne to motivate kar diya!
[07:36] myname178: cheer up! yahi hai jeene ka style
[07:36] Ishan: ab josephite hona kise kehte hain dikhana padega :D
[07:36] Ishan: yo dude, u're absolutely rite...
[07:36] myname178: don't spoil urself for future!

[07:36] Ishan: how's ur photography going?
[07:37] myname178: oohho :(
[07:37] myname178: camera gone to sevice centre
[07:37] myname178: :(

[07:38] myname178: :'D
[07:38] Ishan: ohhh
[07:38] Ishan: kab aayega?
[07:38] myname178: hoping to come back in 1 week or ten daz
[07:39] Ishan: oh
[07:39] myname178: it was around 3 weeks bck when it got infected
[07:39] Ishan: main yahaan video logging kar raha hoon
[07:39] Ishan: ohhhh, nooooo :o
[07:39] myname178: means
[07:39] Ishan: virus?
[07:39] myname178: ??

[07:39] myname178: wat type of virus
[07:39] Ishan: check this: http://icy-second-year.blogspot.com
[07:39] myname178: ??
[07:39] Ishan: arre no virus
[07:39] Ishan: check the blog
[07:40] myname178: okeys
[07:40] myname178: hold on
[07:43] myname178: oops.
[07:43] myname178: pluggin download mangta hai
[07:43] Ishan: ohhh, haan flash player maybe
[07:46] myname178: dial-up is frustrating. lemme fix it...
[07:46] myname178: tu padhai kar
[07:46] Ishan: okok :) bye
[07:47] Ishan: enjoy...

Due work in coming days: complete the painting which I started in dushehra holidays.
I've also started reading a new book- An autobiography: Jawaharlal Nehru and realised that reading someones(whom you don't know personally) autobiography can be either very boring or very intresting.
In yesterday's chat with Aman I told him about my plans of 10.0 in next semester. This is to see if I have enough fighting spirit left in me to fight for a target. This spirit is degrading since I came to IIT after JEE.

Saucy the poet!

When I was returning to home in the morning in the train this time
Somehow I took a pen and found a piece of paper and started writing.

Then what I wrote was was strange even to me. A sonet! Hai! Ye kaise ho gaya. Once Mrs. Gandhi told us the definition of poetry as spontaneous flow of emotions of heart through the pen. It can't completly disagree with the statement
The lines were thoda bakwas but I got rythming ones. Here it is:

Now I can see the change
Earlier which was out of my range.
I can see the birds flying free
Conversation of the wind and the leaves high on the tree.
I can hear what every cattle passing by me had to say to me for so long,
Buzzing of bees and birds singing song.
The cloud is not there only to seal,
It seams it has some special appeal.
When I look at cirrus, I try to find
The perplexion, the confusion similar to one in my mind.
I look back at the doom from which I have evolved,
But there is too much left to be resolved.
Now I feel how each moment is blessed apon us,
Now I understand why somebody said God is within us.

Also produced a testimonial for Asif. Goes like this:

Asif bhai. The one with "most-wanted assets" in our wing. Famous for large amount of comic database in his G drive. Can blow up anyone with those pranks! Easy to compete, difficult to beat and impossible to cheat. Good at befriending people, specially gals. (remember Priya Sharma).
Someone with infinite enthusiasm to be on top. You can call him a Future-Planner. Usually emotionally strong but feels broken at times, needs someone to collect the bits and rebuild a 3-quarters-kgs Asif.
May you achive your goal in life.
Good Luck!
Saurabh Chawdhary

Abhi bhi something seems missing! Thats not the exact Asif for you. I'll wait for the ideas. Because ideas come spontaneously!

Saucy the poet!

When I was returning to home in the morning in the train this time
Somehow I took a pen and found a piece of paper and started writing.

Then what I wrote was was strange even to me. A sonet! Hai! Ye kaise ho gaya. Once Mrs. Gandhi told us the definition of poetry as spontaneous flow of emotions of heart through the pen. It can't completly disagree with the statement
The lines were thoda bakwas but I got rythming ones. Here it is:

Now I can see the change
Earlier which was out of my range.
I can see the birds flying free
Conversation of the wind and the leaves high on the tree.
I can hear what every cattle passing by me had to say to me for so long,
Buzzing of bees and birds singing song.
The cloud is not there only to seal,
It seams it has some special appeal.
When I look at cirrus, I try to find
The perplexion, the confusion similar to one in my mind.
I look back at the doom from which I have evolved,
But there is too much left to be resolved.
Now I feel how each moment is blessed apon us,
Now I understand why somebody said God is within us.

Also produced a testimonial for Asif. Goes like this:

Asif bhai. The one with "most-wanted assets" in our wing. Famous for large amount of comic database in his G drive. Can blow up anyone with those pranks! Easy to compete, difficult to beat and impossible to cheat. Good at befriending people, specially gals. (remember Priya Sharma).
Someone with infinite enthusiasm to be on top. You can call him a Future-Planner. Usually emotionally strong but feels broken at times, needs someone to collect the bits and rebuild a 3-quarters-kgs Asif.
May you achive your goal in life.
Good Luck!
Saurabh Chawdhary

Abhi bhi something seems missing! Thats not the exact Asif for you. I'll wait for the ideas. Because ideas come spontaneously!

Cubing

Cubing all day from yesterday. Learnt to solve the cube. Now I'll practice on being faster..
Saw another interesting sport. Speeed Stacking!
Wached a movie after a long time. Vanilla Sky staring Penelope Cruz and Tom Cruise.

Quarter-life Crisis

The quarter-life crisis is a term, coined in 2001 by philanthropist Alan Harper, and Abby Wilner and Alexandra Robbins, authors of Quarterlife Crisis: The Unique Challenges of Life in Your Twenties, and is applied to the period of life immediately following the major changes of adolescence, usually ranging from the ages of 21 - 29.
It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are a lot of things about yourself that you didn't know and may or may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.
You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones.

Characteristics of this crisis are:

• feeling "not good enough" because one can't find a job that is at his/her academic/intellectual level
• frustration with relationships, the working world, and finding a suitable job or career
• confusion of identity
• insecurity regarding the near future
• insecurity regarding present accomplishments
• re-evaluation of close interpersonal relationships
• disappointment with one's job
• nostalgia for university or college life
• tendency to hold stronger opinions
• boredom with social interactions
• financially-rooted stress
• loneliness
• desire to have children

These emotions and insecurities are not uncommon at this age, nor at any age in adult life. In the context of the quarter-life crisis, however, they occur shortly after a young person – usually an educated professional, in this context – enters the "real world". After entering adult life and coming to terms with its responsibilities, some individuals find themselves in a world of career stagnation and extreme insecurity.

As the emotional ups-and-downs of adolesence and college life subside, many in the quarter-life crisis experience a "graying" of emotion. While emotional interactions may be intense in a high school or college environment – where everyone is roughly the same age and hormones are highly active – these interactions become subtler and more private in adult life. Nobody wants to admit to feeling like a 'loser' (especially not twentysomething men). This secrecy intensifies the problem. In his book, Barr reveals many of the anxieties twentysomethings have. Chief among these is the fear that everyone else is having an amazing time in their twenties.

Furthermore, a contributing factor to this crisis may be the difficulty in adapting to a workplace environment. In college, professors' expectations are clearly given and students receive frequent feedback on their performance in their courses. By contrast, in a workplace environment, a person may be, for some time, completely unaware of a boss's displeasure with his performance, or of his colleagues' dislike for his personality. Office politics require interpersonal skills that are largely unnecessary for success in an educational setting. Emerging adults eventually learn these social skills, but this process – sometimes compared to learning another language – is often highly stressful.

Erik H. Erikson, who proposed eight crises that humans face during development, also proposed the existence of a life crisis occurring at this age. In his developmental theory, he proposed that human life is divided into eight stages, each with its own conflict that humans must resolve. The conflict he associated with young adulthood is the Intimacy vs. Isolation crisis. According to him, after establishing a personal identity in adolescence, young adults seek to form intense, usually romantic relationships with other people.

Identity vs. Role-confusion, giving credence to the theory that late-20th century life, with its bizarre mix of extreme comfort and insecurity, is causing people to mature at a slower rate.

N.B.
Reference: http://www.cds.caltech.edu/~shane/text/quarterlifecrisis.html
Source: wikipedia

END of the SEMESTER!!

So finally!!! One more semester at IITK done away with. End-sems exams over. Five exams in five days. Nearly got cramps in my knee joints just studying and more studying.
talking of Exams, not a great one but average. And Im satisfied. No feeling absolutely LAZY. Can't even right much now.
Thinking of getting a laptop in next sem.
MARKS. Got 66.5/80 in Thermo. Expecting an A grade or B grade. 89/120 in TA. Expecting A. And Electrical once again frustrating. 55.5/80. I don't care the grade now! A s much absofuckinglutely filthy course. Beaten by the hard hammers of this course whole long semester, lately I had developed immunity to it. So after that more sufferings. And now no more blows..

This semester had been largely different from the other two. I had more reasons for what I did this time. And more than ever.

Plans for holidaz and industry job

With exams starting from Monday today was just a magai day. Mugged up Organic Chem. And so much to say about the Organic chem. instructor. Don't know why these people have born grudges against us(students)! He puts his best possible efforts to make sure that we are in worst possible situations.
And the Electrical course! uhh... One course which made my life miserable. Nothing to learn! Only to suffer. And such an idiotic instructor! God save me! I have decided to leave that course as it is. I'll give only one try on sat. Do hell with the grade. I will not suffer anymore. Course wise Chem is a good one but the bloddy instructor. As a part of expressing out our frustration , we are, apart form using loving words for him, these days, thinking of noble ways to take revenge on him. Some of which are making blank calls at his home in night (dat 1 is difficult coz he has caller ID), submitting his work email ID in the porn sites so that he gets loads of spams in his mail box.

The holiday plan. Befor going for trip on 6th and after my last exam on 1st, I'll have almost 5 days. Made some plans to utilize those days. I'll try to study Data Structures with CSE guys having exams on 4rt. Read old and new editions of the Better Photography magzine. Read all the editorials of Hindu that I've missed. Try to look for good books on Indian Philosophy in the lib. Apart from all this lots of chatting orkutting and blogging.

Industry. Industry had never fascinated me. In the morning discussed this with Asif and Shadab both of whom want industry job. I very clearly put ma point . I will never love a job in industry. All this hectic shedule is going to kill me. There you have no life left for yourself. You are dedicated to your boss. Moreover, you need to do lot of fake things, things which have no meanings and no substance. Just to show your boss that you are the one. Show off is not a part of Saucy. I never said the it is a mean/wrong jog and nobody should do such things. It's just the matter of loving. If any of you love to do then you wil do that. I will not choose that!

Found an excellent qoute on somebody's blog: Nobody is Virgin. Life fucks everyone!. Started reading some other people's blog One a girl named Lakshmi. She also writes about her life in an interesting way.

It is bout 2:30 now. Most probably Im going to miss tomorrow's morning thermo tutorial also.

Bhatia's Testimonial under construction...

Writing testi for him is a difficult task . coz he is some1 I know inside-out. Compressing testi to 1024 chars is difficult. I can write a post on him. But accumulated ideas to get the one below:

When I first saw him I was dazed! What is this football like thing! Latter I came to know ki Bhatia ji jitna zamin ke uper hai utna hi niche bhi. Don't go on size! (Now he has improved his aspect ratio [])
Being with this guy past 3 years I've known him inside out. A guy with unbelievable capacity to learn, unbelievable capacity to work, and with unbelievable wicked ideas to tease anyone. His whole body is composed of gray matter. He is kind of guy who can defeat his coach in just anything.
I can never forget him once saying this funny line "Mai to co-ed ke naam pe dhabba hu".
We share lots of lots common and less of contradicting thinking about all aspect and all issues of life. Of late we discovered we both are in similar quarter-life-crisis.

Rest of the day was good in terms of exam preparations. Studied decent amount of stuffs. Some Physical Chem. and wave equations in maths. That's all!

no title

Yesterday downloaded the form for the internship. I shows some fields that Im not able to answer. Still not sure whether to appl or not. They are asking fellowshp for work in fluid dynamics. It would have been better if I had done a course in Fluid Mech. But I will be havng it in next sem. If the date for the application is after that then I can get the form filled at least when Im doing a course in Flu mech. So I can get at least something to fill in.

On the road. While I was on my way to lecture hall on my cycle, just before the gate, in a hurry mood, with the fresh laziness of the morning, ready to be assaulted by proffessors, was just about to crash in some object. Object identified! Another man with gray hairs and matching once- white kurta- payjama, on his cycle. It was my fault for this apparent crash. So normally I would expect a person whom I have never been aquainted to give a killing stare oo a moderately loud murmer or some abuses. But this man was not upto the expectations. The reaction was just opposite. Smile! He gave me a broader than broad smile and passed on! I would have neglected the event owing to the length of time it occured and all the wild thoughts of exams running through my head. But mind you people this not something you encounter everyday. He would have got one tenth of a second to make his neuron cells click. Even the first response of the humblest of person would have have been a stare. But why does this man reacted so differently? What must be the reason? Let us explore.
Was he God that he controlled his response to stimulus so well? Every person is a hybridisation of God and Evil. But being God would mean 100% God character which voilates all phisical, chemical, spiritual,.. laws. It is quite possible that just before this accident he had encountered something that granted his long - wished wish. And sunshined by that happiness he was able to give such a response. Or he might have seen his lost loved one in me that he couldn't help but smile.
Whatever the reason may be, it was an unforgetable and a rare event for me. It is for that reason that I have so much to describe for that one second

Shadab again. Still trying to prove that he is even greater shit. He boasts that he is able to flirt a proff's daughter. Chats with her all day Makes fool of her. Tells all kind of lies. Makes her fight with her friends. And these foolish girl leave their genuine friends for such bastered. And the bastered taking it as a credit to him that he is able to do such rubbish thing.

Orkut Fortune: When winter comes heaven will rain success on you
Let us see what type of rain is it. Success! Is that what we strive for? Because it gives happiness? Or it is happiness that we strive for? Second argument seems more appealing

Internship?

Last night Shadab told me about an internship in some institute at banglore. Have to think at it first. will it be better than a summer project or not. Talked with a senior and he says it will be good. But he doesn't knows about how good the institute is. This is the chat log with him:

4:01 AM me: hi

abs: hi...

4:02 AM me: subah kaha the

abs: yaad nahi...........

accha main so r4aah tha

1 baje tak

4:03 AM me: ha ha

achha winters me kya kar rahe ho

abs: pehle to hum dep trip pe ja rahe the

lekin ab kai log nahi ja rahe hian

to main bhi nahi jaoonga

kuvh din yehi ruk k fir ghar chala jaoonga

me: kab hoti hai

4:04 AM abs: wintrs mein jati hai

me: is summer to industrial training jana hoga

abs: haan

intern to karni hi hia

4:05 AM me: kuch pakka hua kya

abs: abhi nahi

me: after 2nd yr me project karna theek hoga ya nahi

4:07 AM ....

abs: bilkul karo

me: intern k liye apply kar sakta hu kya?

abs: tum chaho to wintrs mein bhi klar sakte ho

4:08 AM intern k liye maar sakte ho...but chances kum hote hain

waise maar k dekho .......

me: proff ko patana hota hai

abs: lag sakti ahi

4:09 AM patana nahi padega.......kisi acche se baat karo

he wll involve you in something

me: as such kisi se jaan pehchan to nahi hai

kisse try kar sakta hu?

abs: uski jaroorat nahi

a k malik

sameer khandekar

4:10 AM me: use to kabhi dekha bhi nahi yaar

abs: koi nahi be

bade acche proffs hain

coool type jao

kaho ki i wan tto learn something

me: ok dekhta hu

abs: haan

aur

4i labs

mein winters mein

4:11 AM cnc coding sikh sakte ho

me: theek hai

abs: haan pata ker lo

me: CNC coding to TA 201 me bhi the

abs: yahhan bhut hai karne ko

coding sikhai thi

??

me: gtm kaisa hai

abs: sahi hai

4:12 AM me: he is my tutor in thermo

abs: bas jao aur baat karo

4:16 AM me: Jawarlal Nehru Centre for Advanced Scientific Research

4:17 AM naam ka institute hai

abs: matlab

me: i mean jaha intern ki baat kar raha tha

4:18 AM abs: mujhe nahi pata ...kaisa hai

me: ok

4:19 AM IISc banglore se related hai shayad

abs: ok

me: fir gtm se baat karta hu

abs: haan

4:20 AM unk reserch k bare mein dekh liyo

what pojts are going on

me: ya

4:21 AM that banglore ppl r giving project related to flu.mech.

abs: ok..

4:22 AM me: lekin abhi tak flu mech. padha hi nahi hai

4:23 AM abs: he will suggest somehitng.........

ager unk pass tumhare liye kuch hoga......to he will ofer

me: ok fir dekhta hu

abs: hmm

me: aur aap kaha apply karbe ki soch rahe hai

4:24 AM abs: her jegeh

:)

me: hai

abs: chal ab main todhi magai karta hoon

4:25 AM me: okey

bye

abs: bi....

mil k batana ki kya hua

4:26 AM me: ok